There's more to life than heartache.

There’s more to life than heartache.
There’s more to life than the bitter taste past relationships leave in your mouth.
But damn, why is it so hard to let go?

I can sit here and be as strong as I want to be one minute, and then down and out the next. It’s like I live on a bipolar rollercoaster. The weird part is that I have forgiven pretty much everyone in my past; including childhood trauma. But there are these times when I just get so upset and angry at everything that has happened. I don’t know why. It’s seemingly taking the best of me though. I have no desire to do anything lately but take care of my kids and make sure they are happy. Everyone else is null and void; which is a shitty way to live.

But I love being around people. I’m that type of bubbly, sarcastic, silly ass person that lives off of interaction with people. It makes me feel better; inside and out. But what does one do when you no longer have the energy or strength to even get up and hang out? To pick up the phone and invite people over because you’re too afraid that the wrong type of hug from the right person is going to make you break down?

So, I sit and wait it out. Eventually I’ll feel better and everything will be right in my world. But that world just may up empty.

*drops mic*